Acknowledging the work of the late Tongan professors, Futa Helu and Epeli Hau’ofa, this is the first in a series of four articles. Teena Brown Pulu revisits Helu’s criticism of development in Tonga by framing interview conversations with Sefita Hao’uli, Kalafi Moala and Melino Maka in a Hau’ofa-styled narrative that draws on satire and tongue-in-cheek prodding as a form of criticism. This is Tongan storytelling with a critical edge which will leave the reader much clearer about the convoluted circumstances and unpredictable politics driving development and democracy in the Kingdom of Tonga.